This is just a little conglomeration of tips I'd like to offer characters in Science Fiction and Fantasy movies that might increase their chances of survival.
- If a monster is chasing you, run out the door. Do not run down to the basement or up on the roof--unless you are either 1) Jackie Chan or 2) a comic book superhero with the ability to fly. Always try to give yourself a "means of egress."
- If one of the bad guys decides to show you all the nitty-gritty details of his operation, run. Immediately.
- If you discover that you are in a movie adapted from a Stephen King novel, find the nearest crazy person with whom you are trapped and tape his/her mouth shut! You might also consider taping his/her wrists and ankles. You may also want to bring some Prozac...
- Never insult a Klingon. No matter how tempting...
- If you are a good guy actively fighting bad guys and you have a girlfriend or a wife, get her out of the country. Suggestion: she might really enjoy some spa time in the Caribbean.
- If your arch-enemy is unconscious, make sure he's dead. This could save the director millions of dollars on extra stuntmen, more CG creation time, explosions, etc.
- Don't wear anything red when the bad guys start to chase you. Take a tip from Edward Norton in The Incredible Hulk and Matt Damon in Bourne Identity: Red attire makes it difficult to hide and will only get you caught. Try green, black, or maybe some camoflauge.
More to come later...
